Church Chat

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

His Feet, Not Mine

I’ve been sitting here pondering the feet of Jesus. Pondering the idea and gift of humbleness. Right now, I pray that I am sitting at the feet of Jesus with my wounded head in His lap as He strokes my hair and tells me “everything is going to be alright, my love. It will be alright”. Sometimes reading, or just remembering scripture helps me go to that place where the Lord is holding me close and telling me just that. I’ve needed His big arms recently. Truthfully, I’ve needed His big arms ever since I went into Ministry. At the point of my accepting my calling to ministry I have needed to sit in the lap of my Lord and have him tell me “everything is going to be alright, my love. It will be alright”.

I never started out life thinking that I was going to be this great missionary/youth pastor/music minister, saving millions of lost souls wherever I could find them. No, no, I wanted to be a veterinarian, or a meteorologist, an artist, or a Country Music star in Nashville. I know, major differences in my career choices, but just follow me here. I wanted to be something amazing that was gentle, smart, sensitive, and appealing. I wanted to be sort of a “super hero” in my own right, but I could never really determine which career really suited me the most. The vet wanted to take care of and coddle, the meteorologist wanted to be smart and highly learned, the artsy side wanted to be approachable to many and kind of quirky, while the singer side wanted a great adventure with a lot of people, travel, and things that not many people get to do. Well, I must say that even though I did not become any of my original choices, I got all of the above wrapped up into one package; Ministry. Yep. Who knew that would happen. Only God. Only God could have predicted my path. Only God could see the hurt before it came and knew how to bandage the pain. Only God would know what many wonders were to lay ahead of me, and only God could love me all the way through it. Yes. I owe a lot to our Heavenly Father, and all He wants in return is me. He wants me to be open to the plans He has in store. He wants me to cuddle up close to his breast when I need a good cry. He wants me to hang on to Him when things get tough. He wants me to praise Him for the good, the bad, and the very ugly. He wants me to let Him tuck me in at night like a Father does best. Yes, I love our God. He’s amazing, and I’m learning so much from Him all the time. I don’t know where I would be if it wasn’t for God and His amazing sacrifice of His only Son. Jesus. What a beautiful name.

I started this off with a title about the feet of Jesus. Kind of interesting, eh? Why yes it is. I am very much amazed by what He did and the road He walked. I am still learning about the humbleness that He walked with. Just thinking about trying to comprehend the humbleness of Jesus is mind-blowing. I don’t think any of us will ever truly grasp or understand it. I’ve dealt with some things in recent times that haven’t made any sense to me whatsoever. One person completely took something out of context and accused me of being unprofessional in my handling of a situation with them. Well, to say the very least it was untrue. This person decided that because I and another party involved didn’t like something they had worked on made us unprofessional. I tried to explain the true situation, but it didn’t seem to help at all. The other party (who just so happens to be male and the irritated person is female) said the exact same thing that I did, and they calmed down but had no apology to give for their “unprofessionalism” (I don’t really think that word is an “ism”, but we’ll pretend for now). That made me so angry and all I could think of doing was seriously injuring that person. I knew that wasn’t the right approach by far, so I secluded myself and began to journal. I let it all out on my pad of paper. Then, I started to think about Jesus. How did He handle situations like these? I knew the answer immediately, and began to pray for my forgiveness and for my heart not to be hardened towards this person and they’re ways of thinking. I needed to forgive even if they didn’t ask for it. I need to do that daily until I am free of this burden. You see, Jesus forgave people who spat on Him, beat Him, called Him names, called Him a blasphemer, and so much more. His response was to “turn the other cheek” because He loved us ALL, and then He died. He died for US. All of us! We may think that because someone treats us badly, or does something to someone else that they are undeserving of His grace. It’s funny how grace and humbleness go hand in hand. This isn’t the first time I’ve dealt with something like this, so you’d figure I’d be good at this and my first response would be, “it’s ok if you want to be like that, and I forgive you even if you don’t know what you are doing”, but it’s far from that. I need just as much work as the rest of this world. I may not have been totally wrong or innocent in any of this, but Jesus lived a life of example, and we all need to follow it and get through the trying times no matter how hard they come at you. Times like that are when it’s very necessary to rest your head in the lap of Jesus and let Hold you until the rain goes away. He’ll calm the storm. He’s done it before, so why not trust Him this time. Jeremiah 29:11. More scripture that helps me through times that require an extra dose of deep humbleness like Jesus is Philippians 2: 1-11. The title/heading over that is “Imitating Christ’s Humility” in my NIV. You should look it up if you don’t know it already. Very powerful stuff.


At 5:19 PM, Blogger April said...

hey babe - beautiful - and very encouraging - i love you!


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